photo © Sara Baker


I dreamed of Jeannie in a radiant light
As I saw her, she turned… took a step to my side
And touched my forehead with loving pride
Pride of what I never knew
For 'twas then she did vanish
Vanish from view
With a look of languish-
Languish -- ah, that I knew!
With dawn, I rose from my slumber
Confused were my thoughts and many in number
Had she been conceived only in mind
Or had she been here?
'Tis a mystery of a kind
But as I think of it now dear
Many years past
Mayhap 'twas not a dream
My Jeannie, my love at last!

1955
© Sara Baker

As twilight fills the spacious sky, a drift
Of pink and purple… golden ashes fly
As silvery music in a swirl they sift
Enchantingly they splash across the sky
The ocean moves in heaving, surging sighs
While in the heavens looms a light, a low
And mellow note in darkened midnight skies
Past shantung silk the clouds they dip and flow

A woman stands beside the rails to seek
This fantasy beyond the boundaries
Where the light of reason penetrates in weak
Distorted streams of toneless shadowed pleas
Her tears are full of memories that beat
As waves against a barren distant coast
She hides herself inside a tomb so neat
That one would think it looks most like a boast

The captain of this very worthy barque
Is hale and hearty, diligent and droll
His head it shines transparent in the dark
But he has never learned to take the roll

The social siren travels every fall
To places where the lights are always dim
A lithe and luscious panther at a ball
Because her only thought is of a him
And through her hair the wanton breezes blow
As though to smother brilliant tongues of flame
That lap a face with skin as white as snow
They call her "Kit" -- I know a better name

The college girl has lost her love of life
She's cynical from knowledge gained too soon
And skies of childhood filled with bitter strife
Her eyes are dry while looking at the moon
She stands alone against a world of fear
Where life is frenzied loneliness of heart
With tranquilizer drugs and frosted beer
She makes her life more bearable in part

1958 
© Sara Baker

Absence is missing
 Missing is longing
 Heart will you cease?
 Mind will you wither?
 Ache, body ache… trembling
 Recede to infinite agony
 Hope… where?
 Within a tear… a sigh?
 Death is reality
 Ideas go beyond
 Immortality rest you there

1965
 © Sara Baker

I joust with the truth I came to find
 Caring is feeling and feeling is pain
 Shall I go out and stand in the rain?
 Perhaps instead a thank you is due
 For coming this far into something new
 Come and sit with me
 Beneath the happiness tree
 And we will see if we can allow
 Ourselves to honestly be here now
1977
© Sara Baker

Rests quietly without
Within the sinews of my soul
The adventurer waits in ambush
No conflict so deep and bitter blooms
As that between these two
Locked in a cage of shimmering ambiguities
I am a plaything of my fears
A paradigm of life deceives me
Imagery surrounds the very heart of being
Placebos smother spontaneity
Illusion fills the void
The brilliance that was life
Is dimmed by bitter tears
Empathy and compassion--
(Save a little for yourself)
Give luster to just being
The gentle flower of friendship's hand
Is flowers for my soul
I thank you without fear
By being there with you
The treasure of our friendship
You gave me room to grow

10/14/77
© Sara Baker



How did I get here
Where am I going
How will I go
Now is yesterday
Today and tomorrow
All wrapped into one
Now is never… and forever
Indecision is barren
Remaining barren
Becoming sterile
Sterility's product --
Non-existence
If's an illusion
So is trying
Life's a mystery
And it's perfectly clear
Choice is motion
Expanding my space
Expanded space is
Life's satisfaction
Stimulating
Child-like
Excitement with maturity
Life's ideal

March 1978
© Sara Baker

photo © Sara Baker

undulating as waves caress the sand
I walk along the shore untouched by the sea
Yet drowning… my being submerged in thought
I was too young to be so old (back then)
When adulthood is consumed in childhood
The choice left for now becomes simple… and complex
The sequence of life -- Child, Adult, then Death
I cannot willingly choose death
As a permanent condition in this life
Yet temporary death becomes necessity
To be reborn a child again
I run along the shore with the wind
Free and open… and safe
I revel in my childhood
Knowing as I do
I must learn to celebrate the temporary
And accept the pleasure that it brings
March 1978
© Sara Baker

How long will it last
Moon and stars
Cool and remote
Soft caressing warmth
Sun burning all day
No warmth emitted
Tears glisten
As a thousand stars
Moon and stars
Say come join with us
And drift to eternity
Sky gathers me
To its bosom
Enclosing me in cloud-soft arms
Oblivion…
In a soft cotton wrap
No more pain
Float forever
Beauty
Is covered by clouds
In missing pain
All the joy and caring in life
Are missed
Too much to miss
I must return
When pain is
More than I can bear
Go to the hill
Beneath the trees
Gaze at the stars and moon
Secrets of the universe
Look back at me
Saying
Endure… persist…
Some future you will be
One with us
For now --
Accept life where you find it

5/15/78 
© Sara Baker

Trees and shade, green and fresh
Sounds of rushing water up ahead
Surrounded by an enchanted world
Peace and tranquillity
Myriads of forest flowers
Birds singing in gay abandon

Now dirty hot strip of asphalt
Reality and society implode upon my time
The beauty here is somehow lost
In translation from wilderness to open road

Children all we sit upon a log
Gazing down at the rippling stream
Currents carry bits of bark and grass
Downstream to lodge against the rocks
Waiting… waiting… exasperation…
Plans have run amuck

Joy regained exploring unknown places
Sights of beauty, strength and charm
Serendipity! Meadows, forests and patches of snow
Comrades all… we join in feasting 'round the fire
A loving space all our own

Morning sun, caressing warmth
Splashing waters in a creek
Climbing higher, search and find
Exhilaration! I am complete!
Spontaneity… free and happy as a child
Sliding gaily down the snowy slope

Back to people, places and things
Sorrow at the loss of serenity and completeness
Accept loss as inevitable
Celebrate joy and its temporary quality
For its transience is the source of its intensity
And memories are forever…

5/30/78
© Sara Baker



Books
Massage my mind
Music
Caresses my soul



8/21/78
© Sara Baker

One says pot is everything
His friend says, no… it's booze
Happiness is everything claims someone
Another speaks for love
They say freedom is everything
Yet some say it's honor
Don't they know…
Nothing is everything

Sept. 1978
© Sara Baker

I had not expected to miss you
Not this much
I had not expected to want you
Not like this
I had expected to feel guilty
At least a little
I had expected to be happy
Don't I have the good life?
I had not expected to find strength
Not out of my weaknesses
I had not expected success
Not out of my defeat
I had expected an unfeeling calm
Not mercurial delight
I had expected to stay one step removed
Instead I am captivated and bewitched
I had not expected to be your friend
You have so many
I had expected to be logical
And I feel instead
I had not expected to love you…

Dec 1978
© Sara Baker
photo © Sara Baker


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